your "call out" on me hit home even though I know it was not me in particular, but I just had posted one that allowed you to address your point overall. Good job!!!

On the wife, good for you. Mine is also seeing it now.

I have no problems with CC if we can pay it off at the end of the month.

I just say each month our goal is to make Income - Expenses a positive number. There are exceptions (i.e. big car bill, medical bill).

Her mother would constantly talk about money and never spend it. She was always saving and never spending. It was because she never knew when her loser son would need to be bailed out otherwise he would be homeless. Guess what MIL, you have passed, and that loser son of yours has been homeless too many times to count after he drugged you and was stealing your money.

I say 401ks you never touch. Take the positive income, save it, and use it to pay off unexpected bills. I have no fear of draining a savings account. I pay cash for used vehicles and run them in the ground.

It took years, but we are now on the same page where we are now looking at building a very nice house on some waterfront land we purchased 15 years ago and is paid off.