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HokieAl

Joined: 10/07/1999 Posts: 15853
Likes: 4627


Here is a view from a strong willed kid who often went opposite parents


It sounds like she is probably around 20ish years old. So remembering how I was at that time it can be tricky with parents.

I knew my parents were smart and respected their opinions, but I also knew that their life experiences and motivations were very different from mine. So there were times that no matter how practical and good their advice might have been, if it conflicted with my core motivations and interests then it was easy to dismiss them (parents just don’t understand).

And here I am 20 years later and some of that is still true. I just have very different priorities and interests and risk taking than my parents. But what did change was when they stopped talking and started to ask more questions. Basically the classic switch to treating me as an adult while also still being my protective parents.

So my one piece of advice would be what I would tell either of my girls (when they are older). Have an adult conversation where you explain to her your perspective about the logical school stuff/marriage stuff and also the emotional concerns about the engagement and her future. As a kid I knew my parents cared but I didn’t understand it. Help her to understand your view. It won’t change her mind but it will help her keep you in mind and to think about more things as these big decisions play out over the next year.

If that doesn’t work then I suggest drinking heavily.

(In response to this post by Full-Set and Moonshine)

Posted: 12/30/2018 at 8:35PM



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Current Thread:
 
  
!#$#!@%$@ Holiday news... -- Full-Set and Moonshine 12/30/2018 11:36AM
  Navy -- Full-Set and Moonshine 12/31/2018 5:43PM
  Has he attended law school yet, or is that next? -- EDGEMAN 12/31/2018 6:09PM
  Recommend you and your daughter watch this: -- EDGEMAN 12/31/2018 09:20AM
  So you're going to be a grandma in 9 months? -- Late 80s Hokie 12/30/2018 4:26PM
  So sorry, FS&M -- GFallsFan 12/30/2018 3:51PM
  Discussion points -- truhokie 12/30/2018 2:46PM
  When I proposed,I was -- VTUD 12/30/2018 2:41PM
  Completely different scenario -- Technocrat 12/30/2018 3:45PM
  I don’t disagree with that. ** -- CPRVHokie 12/30/2018 3:51PM
  Your connecting of dots is somewhat of a reach IMO ** -- 133743Hokie 12/30/2018 2:26PM
  And I care because why again? ** -- Technocrat 12/30/2018 3:46PM
  The voice of reason here. How we've felt since we heard.* ** -- Full-Set and Moonshine 12/30/2018 1:32PM
  This will surely go to his half-empty head ** -- truhokie 12/30/2018 1:49PM
  Low bar ** -- CPRVHokie 12/30/2018 12:58PM
  Big day for ol’ CPRV ** -- CPRVHokie 12/30/2018 1:33PM
  Get over yourself Yoda and Happy New Year :) ** -- grill to chill 12/30/2018 1:35PM
  I would like advice from objective parties. ** -- Full-Set and Moonshine 12/30/2018 12:02PM
  Actually I hadn't thought of that one . -- Full-Set and Moonshine 12/30/2018 11:59AM
  Can she cover her crazy parents as dependents? ** -- Full-Set and Moonshine 12/30/2018 12:02PM
  Aviano would be nice! ** -- `lag 12/30/2018 6:23PM
  Unfortunately, no! ** -- F4EHokie 12/30/2018 12:04PM

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